


Magic Kingdom

by BiscuitsForPotter



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Ben Solo Needs A Hug, Disney World & Disneyland, Established Relationship, F/M, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, POV Ben Solo, Rey Needs A Hug, Soft Ben Solo
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-14
Updated: 2020-06-19
Packaged: 2021-03-03 19:33:34
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 8,256
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24710878
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BiscuitsForPotter/pseuds/BiscuitsForPotter
Summary: Rey wants to go to Disneyland. Ben wants to be a good boyfriend and take her there, even if it'll make him miserable.
Relationships: Rey/Ben Solo, Rey/Ben Solo | Kylo Ren
Comments: 47
Kudos: 190





	1. The Ticket

**Author's Note:**

  * Translation into Español available: [El reino mágico](https://archiveofourown.org/works/26375221) by [Kate_Hoshina](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kate_Hoshina/pseuds/Kate_Hoshina)



> My first foray into Reylo! It is 3 chapters and already written.
> 
> I hope you all enjoy! Love to Graceful Lioness for her beta work!
> 
> Disneyland, Magic Kingdom  
> Disneyland, I close my eyes real tight  
> Wishing hard I might, wishing hard I may  
> Find my way to  
> Disneyland, Gotta get to  
> Disneyland, on a western breeze  
> Magic carpet please, carry me away
> 
> I know you're gonna say the trees are paper mache  
> It's done with mirrors, the magic there  
> Each little birds full of springs, you press a button it sings  
> Recorded music in the air  
> They've had the mountain refaced it's only plywood and paste  
> Go on say it! I'll turn around and tell you I don't care
> 
> I will live in Disneyland  
> Make my home in Disneyland  
> Maybe it's all fake, that's a chance I'll take  
> It's perfectly okay  
> Someone give me Disneyland  
> Take me there to Disneyland  
> And when I get to Disneyland  
> I'll stay
> 
> -Disneyland, from the musical Smile

If Ben had his way, he would avoid crowds for the rest of his life. He would spend his days in quiet places. Just him, a mug of green tea, and a considerable pile of books. 

That’s what he had always wanted for as long as he could remember. 

And then Rey had come into his life.

Rey, who loved to sing along to animated movies with her friends. Rey, who blasted bubbly pop music in the garage where she worked as a mechanic. Rey, who could make friends with the person in front of her in line at the grocery store. 

It was solely because of _her_ that they had even become friends. If the onus had fallen on Ben’s shoulders, he’d have remained awkwardly silent; too shy—too intimidated to move beyond ‘hello’. It had taken him a while to come to terms with their friendship, even months into it. A girl like her—a guy like him… they weren’t exactly two peas in a pod. 

And yet she’d burst into his world and torn down the walls he’d built around himself brick by brick until he hardly recognized the relatively happy person he’d become.

They’d met the first week of their freshman year at Chandrila University, placed together as lab partners for the semester in Physics 110. He’d been in a foul mood that day, forced to sit through hour after hour of ice breaker activities until he wanted to punch the wall and lock himself in his room with his dog-eared copy of _On The Road_. 

Then Rey walked over, dressed head to toe in the brightest assortment of clothes he’d ever seen with an even brighter smile on her face. He was immediately intrigued by her eyes—wide pools of soft hazel. They drew him in with their honesty and kindness. But the thing he noticed the most was her unique hairstyle. 

“It’s how my mum used to do it,” was all the information she gave up when Ben inquired about the three buns on the back of her head. A moment passed when Ben was sure he’d said the wrong thing. Like he always did. Her hazel eyes flashed with sadness, the corners of her mouth twitching. But whatever bothered her, she recovered quickly. “So how about the dining hall?” she gushed, a grin spreading across her face again. “Did you know that they have pizza _every single day_?” 

And although Ben didn’t think much of a dining hall that served variations of the same greasy pizza seven days a week, Rey’s joy was infectious. He found himself wrapped around every word she spoke as she chatted his ear off the rest of the hour. 

By the time their professor dismissed them for the day, Ben was a goner. 

It had taken him months to admit it and even longer than that to do something about it. But apparently everyone on campus knew that he was in love with his best friend, and after a pep talk from Armie and Rose and four shots of vodka, he finally had the courage to ask Rey on a date six months ago.

And she had said yes. And kissed him! 

Of the dismally short list of all the things in his life that had gone well, asking Rey out was definitely at the top.

There was something different about Rey. Something special. Her presence in his life didn’t completely reverse his hermit-like habits, but she dragged him to enough hangouts and parties that he got used to the idea of having a social life. 

But even some things were too much for him. 

He still didn’t like crowded places or exhausting situations. He put up with them on Rey’s behalf, but they certainly weren’t his cup of tea. 

And that left him with quite the conundrum. He loved to make Rey happy—lived for it, even. 

But this might have been too much.

Rey wanted to go to Disneyland for her birthday. 

_Disneyland._

Not that she said so. She wasn’t exactly the type of person to ask for things. 

That’s just how Rey was. It had taken him a long time to figure that out about her. Despite her outward appearance as an extroverted, bubbly social butterfly, Ben knew her to be incredibly timid when it came to vocalizing her wants. She often dismissed them or shrugged them off, saying that they didn’t matter. 

It had been confusing for Ben at first, and he’d just forged ahead with his own wants for a time, assuming she just didn’t have strong opinions on what toppings she wanted on her pizza or what dorm she wanted to try to live in at room draw. He’d grown up around people with strong opinions and even stronger wills, and it made his head buzz with confusion whenever Rey didn’t seem to have either. But after two years as lab partners and friends and another six months of dating, he’d finally started to _‘speak Rey.’_

Rey did express what she wanted. Just not out loud. 

She did it with her eyes. 

Ben could always tell her wants and needs by looking at those same eyes he had found so intriguing when they first met. He remembered the look he had seen in them on that day—the one occasion that she talked about her hair and her mom. They’d become melancholy, but only for a short while. Most of the time her eyes were bright and curious. And when she looked at something she wanted, like a pain au chocolat in the bakery case at the student union Starbucks, they practically sparkled.

He now made it a point to order one for her the second they made it up to the counter. 

That’s exactly how she looked at Disneyland. Every time they drove past it on the Five, she’d stare out the window, her eyes locked on the tip of the Matterhorn. Sometimes it was with a wistful eye, but most of the time, it was with longing—a hunger, almost.

This didn’t go unnoticed on Ben’s part. He tried to ignore it at first, mostly because he really didn’t like Disneyland. The crowds and the over-the-top marketing and the waiting in line… those were all the things he hated most in the world. 

But as time went on and his friendship with Rey morphed into something _more_ , he found that the idea of making her happy greatly outweighed his resistance to making himself miserable for a day. 

~*~*~*~

“What’s all this?” Rey tilted her head as she sat down at the two-person table in the dining hall. Her eyes were trained on the blue envelope he’d leaned against the salt and pepper shakers.

Ben wiped his sweaty palms against his dark jeans. “Well,” he said with a sheepish grin, “I happen to know that tomorrow is your birthday.” 

Rey blinked. Ben watched her eyes closely as he waited for her to respond. Something akin to sadness flashed in them, but only very briefly. The next moment, her eyebrows raised in anticipation. When he said nothing, letting his gaze dart down to the envelope instead of getting a proper answer, they raised even more.

“Ben Solo, what’s going on?” 

Though her tone was firm, the slight quirk at the corner of her lips told him that maybe he had done the right thing in surprising her. 

“It’s your birthday present. I think this is something you wanted. I mean, I hope so, at least.” 

“Ben, I don’t need anything—”

“Birthdays are about wants, not needs, Rey.”

She huffed. “Fine. I don’t _want_ anything.” 

“Please.” He offered her a small smile. “Just open it and then let me know if you still don’t want it.” 

Brows now furrowed, she plucked the blue envelope from the table and slit it open, all the while her suspicious eyes never leaving his. 

Ben held his breath as she reached inside and pulled out the ticket voucher he had printed out in the library earlier. His stomach was in knots. What if he had misread the whole thing and didn’t want to go to Disneyland? What if she thought it was too much and got angry that he spent about two-hundred dollars on this? She was very frugal, and—

“Ben?” Her voice barely crossed the table, it was so faint. She held the unfolded voucher in her shaking hand. Her hazel eyes were wide—wider than he’d ever seen them before. “Is this what I think it is?” 

“Well if you think it’s Disneyland tickets, then yes.”

Maybe he should have said something more clever. He’d never been very witty. But then, neither had she. It was one of the reasons they worked so well together.

“Ben, I—this is— _oh my god!_ ” 

Rey jumped to her feet, ran around the table, and launched herself at him. Her arms wrapped around his shoulders and she buried her head against his neck. 

“Thank you!” she cried. “I’ve never been and I— _wow!”_

When Rey pulled back to arm’s length, Ben got another look at her eyes. They were alight with more joy than he’d ever seen in them before. And that was saying something. He simply smiled back at her, relishing in a job well done on his part. The anxious weight that had been sitting in his stomach for several days as he hemmed and hawed about this gift floated away, leaving him light and giddy. 

When was the last time he had felt _giddy?_

_You always feel giddy when it comes to Rey,_ a voice in his head answered. 

“So you’ve never been?” he asked as she took her seat again and dug into her stir fry. “Didn’t you grow up in SoCal? I thought every kid went at least once. I went so many times, mostly with one nanny or another.” 

Rey looked down at her plate. Ben could tell that she was trying to hide her face. She pushed the food around her plate a bit. 

“Not every kid,” she mumbled. “I never got the chance.” 

Ben blinked. For some reason, Rey’s words brought the heaviness in his stomach right back. 

But almost immediately, her head snapped up, a smile lighting up her face again. The turnaround of her emotions nearly gave him whiplash. “But it’s wonderful you went so much as a kid. Gosh, you must know all about Disneyland! You’ll have to show me all your favorite parts!”

Ben bit back the urge retort with a sharp, ‘ _What favorite parts?’._

“—I’ve heard the food is amazing! And that there’s mickey-shaped everything. And the rides are so much fun. And aren’t there fireworks? Unless—” 

She drew back again, her cascading words falling to an immediate trickle. 

Ben frowned. “Unless what? What’s wrong?”

Rey fidgeted with the fork in her hand. “I just—the only other time I’ve been somewhere with rides, they charged for _everything_. Not just the admission fee. You had to pay for each ride and for seating to watch fireworks and things… I mean, the ticket is wonderful, but I can’t afford—”

“The only thing not covered is food and souvenirs. And don’t worry. I’ve got you.” 

“You’ve… got me? Like, you’re paying for everything?”

“Yep.”

Rey’s eyes narrowed. He could practically see the wheels turning in her head. “What’s in this for you? I mean, you don’t exactly seem like the kind of guy who wants to take a picture with Mickey.” 

“You’ve got me there.” Ben chuckled. “But seriously. Whatever you want. All day. You can have all the Mickey pretzels you want. We can ride Space Mountain twenty times. Whatever.” 

Rey dropped her fork on her plate with a clatter and walked around the table to hug him again. 

“Seriously, Ben. This is the nicest thing anyone has ever done for me.” 

His stomach dropped a little, like it always did when Rey said things like this. One time she thanked him six times for buying her eggs and milk at the grocery store when she forgot her wallet at home. On another occasion, when he shared his umbrella with her during a rare downpour, Rey looked at him like he was made of pure sunshine. 

There were plenty of things he didn’t know about Rey, and that was fine. But sometimes he wondered if she would ever open up enough to tell him why such simple acts of kindness seemed to mean everything to her. 


	2. The Park

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Rey is excited and Ben is trying to be.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm floored by the response to the first chapter! Thank you, guys!
> 
> Honestly, this fic is my love letter to Disney Parks. I used to be a cast member at Walt Disney World and it was my favorite job ever. 
> 
> Beta work by Graceful Lioness
> 
> As always, I hope you enjoy!

The alarm blared at half past six the next morning, well before Ben was used to waking up. Especially on a Saturday. He groaned and shoved his face deeper into his pillow. There was some reason he had to get up early, he knew it, but perhaps five more minutes wouldn’t hurt…

His drifting brain was interrupted by shuffling sounds across the room. After a second, he felt a slight pressure on his upper back.

“Ben? Ben. Wake up. You said we needed to get up early.”

Rey.

Her birthday.

_Disneyland._

His feet were already hurting just thinking about the amount of walking he was going to do today.

“I’m up, I’m up,” he grumbled, pushing his hair out of his face and sitting up. When his sleep-blurred vision came into focus, he found that Rey was not only already awake. Oh, no. She was already dressed in denim cut-offs, a bright yellow tank top, and _fuck,_ even sneakers.

Rey’s gaze bored into him like an excitable puppy, eager and impatient for the day to begin.

“How long have you been awake?” Ben rubbed his eyes and pushed himself to his feet.

“Since five.”

_“Five?”_

“I couldn’t sleep.” Rey shrugged. Ben noticed then that she had a mini backpack hanging off her shoulder as well. Shit, she really was eager. A knot of dread made its way up his throat at the prospect of facing the day ahead. But he had signed up for this. And he was doing it. For Rey.

“Of course you couldn’t.” Ben forced himself to perk up a bit as he reached into his immaculately organized closet to pull out a plain, black T-shirt—one of several he owned. “You’re going to Disneyland today.”

“I know!” She jumped up and down, her giddy grin spreading from ear to ear.

Excitement rolled off Rey in waves. She tapped her feet on the floor of their shared dorm room as he got dressed and grabbed his wallet, where the vouchers were tucked safely inside. Once they climbed into Ben’s car twenty minutes later, she took to bouncing her knee and crumpling the paper bag leftover from her usual Starbucks pain au chocolat.

Rey continued to fidget, even as they pulled into the parking garage, rode the tram, and stepped ever closer to the entrance.

“Are you nervous?” Ben asked as they walked through the tightly-packed pathway past the World of Disney store. He really needed to start some sort of conversation or he’d get bogged down by the crowd. He looked down at her wringing hands and barely-there grin. “Because you look like you want to puke.”

Rey shook her head. “I’m… I don’t know. I’m so excited that I don’t know what to do with myself. I don’t think I’ve ever felt so excited in my life, honestly. I've never liked getting my hopes up. Do you think it can possibly live up to the picture in my head?" Rey trailed off for a second before coming to an abrupt standstill, her jaw practically falling off its hinges. Her breath grew ragged and her hazel eyes were their widest yet.

“Is that— _is that it?_ ”

Ben turned to see what she was looking at.

There, sitting down the plaza and to the left, was the main gate to Disneyland. Ben knew it by heart. How many times had he been here as a kid? At least a dozen.

It was unmistakable. And while the sight of the train station didn’t do much for him, for Rey, the effect was immediate.

Her face split into a giant grin and she let out a loud, _“Ha!”_ her hands jumping to cover her mouth.

“Still nervous?” He elbowed her and she only began to jump more.

“Ben! We’re here! I’m actually—that’s _Disneyland!_ ”

Ben couldn’t help the grin that spread across his own face. “Yeah, Rey. That’s Disneyland. Now are we going to stand out here staring at it all day, or are we going to go in?”

Rey hopped all the way to the main gate, the biggest, stupidest smile accentuating her dimples. She continued to hop, even after the cast member had scanned their tickets and Ben tried to get her to take a picture in front of the entrance.

“I just can’t help it,” she pouted as Ben shot her an exasperated look from behind the lens of his phone. “I’m just too excited!”

As they funneled into the park through a tunnel, Ben’s anxiety kicked up a bit. He was surrounded on all sides by humans he did not know. They were shuffling and bumping into his shoulder, and it made his skin crawl just a little. The urge to retreat—to run back to the parking garage and find a quiet cafe to spend his day instead—was unusually strong.

Ben closed his eyes, trying to ground himself. He could do this. For Rey. For her birthday.

By the time he opened his eyes again, they were through the tunnel and had emerged onto Main Street. Being out in the air was a little better, and Ben shifted his focus back to Rey.

He drew back when he saw that she was crying.

Crying. At Disneyland.

Had he already gone and fucked this day up?

But then he looked closer and saw, beneath the tears pooling in her eyes, there was an expression he had never seen her wear before.

_Wonder._

He watched as she soaked it all in, turning in a slow, clockwise circle. He watched her light up as she spotted the steam engine at the train station and the Dapper Dans over by the firehouse. And when her eyes finally landed on the far end of Main Street—to the pink and blue castle—Ben wished his phone had been out in the moment, because the look on her face was one he wanted to keep in his pocket forever.

He reached for her hand, lacing their fingers together. Bending down, he placed a kiss on the top of her head. “Happy Birthday, Rey. What do you think?”

“It’s so much more beautiful than I could have ever imagined,” she breathed.

Ben didn’t know if he could honestly describe the place as beautiful. Beyond the overheated masses and overpriced _everything_ , he knew the place was just plaster and illusions. Any rational adult could see it. This was a place for kids.

But if it made Rey happy....

He smiled and patted her shoulder. “I’m glad it’s surpassing your expectations. Now come on, let’s grab a map and get started.”

They made their way down Main Street, albeit very slowly. Rey wanted to look in every window and she insisted on taking multiple selfies together. By the time they got to the castle, Ben was very sick of getting his picture taken at—he checked his apple watch—eight thirty in the morning.

Thankfully, Rey didn’t stop to take photos as they turned left toward Adventureland. She spent every moment pointing out little details, squeezing his hand every time she saw something new.

“Is that—” She consulted her map. “—The Enchanted Tiki Room?”

Ben fought back a groan. “Yeah…”

Rey looked up and eyed him with suspicion. “Not your favorite?”

“Not by a longshot. The animatronic birds are kind of creepy. And the song used to get stuck in my head for hours. But if you want to go—”

A glint of mischief filled Rey’s eyes. Her nose wrinkled in that way Ben found completely irresistible. “I kind of do, sorry.”

She didn’t look sorry at all.

“Especially since it might annoy you. Yes. We’re going in. We have to.”

She dragged him through the little gateway and into the waiting area, and from the moment the show began five minutes later, Ben was in hell.

It was worse than he remembered. The clicking and clacking of the fifty year-old animatronics were almost louder than the soundtrack and one of the tiki faces on the walls was definitely stuck. But worse than being kitschy and outdated, that stupid song was just as much of an earworm as he remembered.

Rey walked out smiling though. And humming. No surprises there.

“That was so cute, Ben! I have no idea what you’re talking about. Creepy? Don’t be ridiculous. Now, what’s next?” She charged ahead without even waiting for him to respond.

Ben sighed.

This was for Rey. It was all for Rey.

She picked the Jungle Cruise next. After waiting in line for what seemed like an absurd amount of time to see fake animals, they climbed into a boat named ‘Amazon Belle’ and Ben’s ears were immediately assaulted by some of the worst puns he had heard in his life. The skipper at the front was particularly enthusiastic, climbing all over everything and teasing Rey, who sat in the seat closest to him.

“See that bamboo over there, folks?” the skipper called as he pointed at some brush on the far side of the boat. “It grows to be six storeys tall. People say it can grow to seven storeys, but that’s a whole other story.”

Ben had been wrong before. _This_ was hell.

Rey ate it all up, though. By the time the Amazon Belle waited to dock, Rey was clutching her stomach in laughter, tears falling freely down her face.

“I’m starting to question my decision to date you,” he said as they made their way back into Adventureland. “If that’s your sense of humor.”

“Are you kidding? That was hilarious! You’re just a stick in the mud, Ben Solo.”

She elbowed him in the ribs and shook her head as they ventured farther. They approached the Indiana Jones ride, and Ben felt a surge of interest for the first time that day. Now _this_ was a ride he’d liked as a kid. The one time he came here with his parents, Mom had spent the entire time in the queue making jokes about how Dad looked just like Indy. She even swooned a bit.

Ben just didn’t see it. 

But that didn’t stop him from asking to ride three times.

Looking at the queue now though, Ben lamented how many people were stuffed in. A glance at the sign directly to the left of the queue made his stomach sink. The wait time was nearly two hours. Rey seemed to have realized this, too.

“Hmm.” She studied the map, her mouth scrunched up. “I’m not a huge Indiana Jones fan. Are you?”

If the line had been any shorter, he might have mentioned that he’d seen every movie many times. Even _Kingdom of the fucking Crystal Skull_. But the thought of being crammed in a queue for nearly two hours was giving him hives. Instead he shrugged. “It’s your day, Rey. We’re here for you.”

She shut the map with a snap. “Right, then. No time for everything! Let’s go somewhere else and come back if we have time.”

Somewhere else was Tarzan’s Treehouse.

Ben took one look at the giant, artificial tree that was ninety-nine percent stairs and forced himself to hide a groan. He hadn’t wanted to go on this thing even as a kid.

Rey was fascinated, though. She climbed the steps with vigor, stopping to examine all the details and touch everything she could get her hands on. She rang the bell, stopped to examine the statues of movie characters that weren’t even moving, and grinned at all the fake scientific equipment near the exit.

Ben just followed along, hoping against all hope that she wouldn’t want to go to Tom Sawyer Island.

Thankfully, the ferry to get there wasn’t what caught her eye. Instead, they went on Pirates of the Caribbean and the Haunted Mansion next. While the rides were actually okay, Rey left both attractions humming the theme songs. She kept humming them, even as he ordered her a small bag of Mickey-shaped beignets.

Ben practically collapsed into his green chair as Rey dug into the first of three pastries. He checked his watch. It was only eleven o’clock. How was that possible? He still had at least ten more hours of this.

“Ben?”

He snapped his head up, plastering a grin on his face.

“Yeah?”

“Are you okay?”

“Oh. Yeah. I’m fine.”

Rey frowned. “Are you sure? Because you seem annoyed.”

Shit.

“I’m not, I swear.” He waved her off, hoping she hadn’t noticed his sour attitude too much. “I’m having a really good day.”

Rey’s eyes narrowed for a moment, but she seemed to accept his answer, because she shoved the rest of the beignet into her mouth.

“Want one?” she asked, holding the last sugar-covered confection up at his eye level.

Ben shook his head. “That’s okay. I’m not really a Mickey-shaped food kind of guy. Besides.” He held up his mint julep. “I’ve got this.”

“I mean, you’re no fun. But suit yourself.”

She stuffed the last beignet into her mouth, missing slightly and leaving behind a dusting of powdered sugar on the tip of her nose. Rey licked her fingers, oblivious.

God, she was adorable.

“Uh, Rey.”

“What?”

“You’ve got— _here_.” Ben reached forward and swiped the tip of her nose with his thumb, showing it to her before wiping his hand off on a napkin. His stomach lurched a little when he watched her cheeks turn a little pink.

They sat in the shade for a few more minutes. Ben tried to decompress while Rey studied the map some more. The day hadn’t been nearly as bad as it could be. He hadn’t had any anxiety attacks and the crowds weren’t too awful. If they kept up this pace the rest of the day, he might make it to the fireworks without Rey noticing.

“I think I want to try Big Thunder Mountain and Splash Mountain next. Is that okay?”

Ben perked up.

Those were rides he liked. At least he remembered liking them. This afternoon was definitely looking up. He could tolerate waiting in line if it meant enjoying a ride.

“And after that, we can go over to Fantasyland. I’ve always wanted to ride _It’s A Small World_!”

Every ounce of him that had prepared to get excited instantly deflated.

_Anything_ but that.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Is the song stuck in your head already? It got stuck in my beta's head. 
> 
> OK so Jungle Cruise puns are my favorite. I'll fight anyone on that. It's my headcanon that Rey loves puns and Ben just hates them so much, but he puts up with them because they make Rey smile.
> 
> Third and final chapter coming on Thursday, 6/18.


	3. The Balloon

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Of Small Worlds, Families, and Balloons.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> We've come to the end, friends. Here is the final chapter of Magic Kingdom! 
> 
> Thanks, as always, to Graceful Lioness.
> 
> I'm so glad I got that song stuck in so many of your heads. 
> 
> You know which one.

Ben wasn’t sure what was worse—walking around a crowded theme park in sopping wet clothes or suffering through _It’s A Small World_ in them.

He’d gotten soaked to the bone on Splash Mountain, and Rey for whatever reason, barely had a droplet on her. He felt extra ridiculous as they walked around hand in hand, her looking beautiful as always and him looking like a drowned rat.

And then they’d gotten on _It’s A Small World_. It was a ride that represented everything he hated. It was kitschy and repetitive and annoying and so goddamn perky that he wanted to rip his ears out less than thirty seconds after the boat entered the stupid tunnel. On top of all that, his clothes were sticking to him and he had to hunch over because his legs were too long for the boat.

Whoever wrote this song needed to be shot.

It wasn’t even one o’clock and he was ready to call it quits. He was officially done. There was only so much of this place he could take. He loved Rey, and he knew he said he would do anything for her, but the farther along they traveled into International-Children’s-Choir-Hell, the closer the walls were closing in on him.

He needed to be alone—needed some space to fucking breathe where there weren’t any animatronics or screaming children or cramped spaces.

And bless Rey. Bless her, because the moment he began to tense up, she noticed. She reached over and squeezed his hand, her eyes shining with concern instead of looking around at the ride she had anticipated so much.

Where there had been the beginnings of anxiety in his stomach, there now sat a brick of lead. Guilt began to eat at him from the inside out. He was being selfish. So fucking selfish. This was her birthday. Coming here was her dream and he was ruining it, just like he ruined everything.

By the time they climbed out of the boats, any trace of a smile had gone from Rey’s face. Wordlessly, she led him over to a quiet corner nearby. They sat on the ground and Rey offered him her water bottle. Ben accepted and took a swig.

He needed to get a grip. Couldn’t he stop being his negative self? Just for one day—that’s all he needed. Was that so much to ask?

All around him, families with strollers—families with babies and toddlers— families with older kids were wandering around, smiling, skipping, and having a good time. He watched the way they all looked so happy with envy in his eyes.

There was a little girl in a princess outfit riding on her dad’s shoulders. Another boy had gotten a bubble wand, and his mom was chasing him around an empty area in the plaza.

_In a flash, it was **him** standing in that plaza, seven years-old with a red Mickey balloon clutched in his much-smaller fingers. Mom had sent him here for the day with the nanny du jour, a woman who clearly didn’t like him. He wasn’t sure what was worse—nannies who were so severe they made him cry or the ones who simpered at him like he was a baby. He’d had lots of those. But this nanny was different. She just seemed to hate him from the beginning. _

_Ben couldn’t remember her name. He only remembered that he followed behind her plain-white sneakers as she led him around the park._

_“Where do you want to go next, Ben?” she asked in a bored voice._

_Ben had looked around and taken in everything around him. The sights. The sounds. Everywhere he looked, he saw happy families. Moms and Dads. Grandmas and Grandpas. Brothers, sisters..._

_And here he was with his stupid nanny._

_“Can’t you come, Mom?” he had asked that morning in the kitchen as he ate a bowl of Honey Nut Cheerios. “Dad?”_

_“Sorry, kid. Your mom and I have a conference to attend all weekend. Lots of sucking up to do. Politics. You know.”_

_Dad patted him on the back like he was trying to make up for being absent. Again._

_“Yeah. I know.”_

_Standing here, in this plaza, Ben had requested to go on the carousel._

_“You already went on that today, but sure. Whatever.”_

_The nanny grabbed his hand to drag him back to Fantasyland, but in the process, Ben’s hand slipped and the balloon flew out of his grip._

_“My balloon!” he cried, jumping in an attempt to retrieve it. But it was too far gone by then, floating higher and higher in the blue sky. Tears welled in his eyes. His fists clenched as sadness was pushed out by anger._

_“I hate you!” he spewed at the nanny. “I hate you and I hate this place! I wanna go home!”_

_As Ben trudged behind those plain white sneakers toward the main gate, he couldn’t help thinking that if his mom and dad had been there, he wouldn’t have lost his beloved balloon._

“Ben?”

He shook his head, vision coming back into focus.

“Mm?”

“Are you there? I thought I lost you for a minute.”

Ben snorted and handed the water bottle back to Rey. “Sorry. Just thinking.”

“You looked sad.”

He grimaced and shifted his legs so they stuck out straight in front of him. How was it that Rey knew him so well?

When he didn’t respond, Rey became more direct.

“What were you looking at?” It was an innocent enough question. He decided to give a vague answer.

“Families.”

Rey nodded. “I’ve been looking at them too.”

Ben’s head turned to face Rey fully. The enamored expression that had filled her features all day had evaporated, replaced by a wistful look instead.

He’d done it. He’d ruined her birthday with his stupidity.

“Look, Rey. I’m sorry. I’m just being a downer like usual. I’m working on enjoying myself. I promise.”

The sad look on Rey’s face disappeared in an instant, furrowed brows and a frown taking its place.

“What are you talking about? You aren’t being a downer.” She reached forward and placed a small hand on his shoulder. Warmth bloomed inside him from her touch. “I can see that you’re trying to have a good time for my sake. I know this isn’t exactly your cup of tea. Disneyland, I mean.”

Ben opened and closed his mouth. Had he been that obvious?

“Sorry,” he mumbled, leaning his head on the planter behind them. “I just… crowds aren’t my thing. You know that. I saw how much you wanted to come here and just kind of hoped it would go okay.”

Rey’s brow furrowed further. “But that’s not what’s bothering you, is it?”

“What do you mean?” Ben blinked.

“I know the kind of crowds that bother you, Ben. That’s why we didn’t go on Indiana Jones. But all the other crowds I’ve seen today—they aren’t the kind that normally give you trouble. What’s _really_ going on?”

Ben shifted again. He scrubbed his face with his hands. “We don’t have to talk about this, Rey. It’s your birthday. I don’t want to depress you.”

“Well it’s my birthday, and I want you to talk. So tell me what you can.” Rey leaned forward and placed a hand on his cheek. “Please, Ben?”

Gulping, Ben tried to push the tightness in his chest to the side. This was Rey. Just Rey. _His_ Rey. 

He could do this.

“Looking at the families, I was just thinking… about my family.”

“Your family?”

Ben nodded. “I came here a lot as a kid, but never with my parents. They were too busy to take me, but didn’t want to deprive me of experiences. So they sent me with nannies, mostly. My uncle once. That was a disaster.”

Rey drew back, eyes wide with bemusement. “They sent you to Disneyland with your Uncle Luke? But he’s the biggest hippie I know. His van is covered in anti-capitalist bumper stickers.”

“Tell me about it.” Ben chuckled through a slight grimace. He turned his head to look back at the plaza. “I may have come here a bunch, but I never liked it. And just now—looking at all these happy families—I can’t help thinking that maybe I just resented this place because I never got to be like the other kids I saw here.”

He really wasn’t sure where the words had come from—he hadn’t spoken at length about his family to Rey or even his therapist in a long time. But as he said them, they felt right. True.

It took Ben a minute before he had the courage to look Rey in the eye again. Those eyes—they could always see right through him. It’s what he loved the most about Rey and what terrified him right down to his bones. When his eyes met hers, there wasn’t pity there, as he had been expecting. There wasn’t anger at his selfishness either.

Instead, her eyes had a look in them he had only seen once.

_“It’s how my mum used to do it.”_

Ben’s eyes flicked to Rey’s hair, always in that same triple-bun style.

“I saw Disneyland on TV a lot when I was growing up. It’s—” She took a deep breath and bit her lip. “—it’s how Plutt used to keep us quiet. Letting us watch tv all day.”

Ben wracked his brain, trying to remember Rey ever mentioning someone named ‘Plutt’ but before he found an answer, she continued on.

“He was my foster father for most of my childhood. Terrible man. Took in lots of foster kids, kept the money for himself. So the only way we really got to see the world outside of our apartment and school was by watching tv. And it wasn’t so bad most of the time. I got to go on safari and I’ve probably seen more black and white movies than I can count.” Rey was smiling to herself now, but like always, her eyes gave her away.

There was no trace of joy there.

“But it was Disneyland that always caught my eye. I saw lots of commercials for it. Everyone who visited seemed so happy. Families. Moms and Dads and their kids… it was everything I wanted but could never have, dangling right in front of me.”

Ben listened, trying to process what Rey was saying. His Rey—his bubbly, joyful, excitable Rey—had she really grown up like that? She never talked about her childhood, not in the two and a half years they had known each other. And he probably shouldn’t have done it, but curiosity got the better of him before he could stop himself—

“I thought you said your mom did your hair?”

Rey’s frown deepened a little. “She did. When I was really young. I barely remember it. But she and my dad left me in a parking lot when I was four.”

“Oh, shit. Rey. I’m sorry.”

Ben officially felt like an ass. Here he was, making a big deal about not seeing his parents as much as he wanted, and her own parents had abandoned her?

“I can hear you thinking, Ben.”

He paused, his eyes jumping to hers.

“And whatever weird guilt trip you’re giving yourself, stop.”

“How—?”

“I know you, Ben Solo. You can’t go two minutes without self-deprecating, whether you say something or not. And just like you don’t want pity, neither do I. I didn’t get to have cool experiences as a kid, but I’m having them now. You didn’t get the affection you needed from your family as a kid, but _I’m_ your family now.”

All the guilt and sadness and shame melted away as he looked at Rey, looking like a sunbeam as she sat beside him.

“You have some bad memories from this place. I don’t have any. So let’s make some new memories together. Some good ones, yeah?”

It was like falling in love with Rey all over again. Ben leaned down to kiss her softly.

“That sounds good,” he whispered against her lips. “But I do have one condition.”

Rey raised one eyebrow. “What’s that?”

“Swear that we won’t go on _It’s A Small World_ again today.”

Rey snorted. “Yeah. I think I can manage.”

~*~*~*~

The first order of business after they stood was to get Ben a new shirt. He perused the options in the nearest giftshop and chose the design he could live with—navy with white Mickeys sublimated across the whole tee.

It could have been much worse. Rey had suggested a shirt with one of the seven dwarves that said, ‘Grumpy For Life’.

“But it matches you so well,” she whined as he emerged from a bathroom wearing the new shirt.

The second thing to do was find something to eat. After munching on a corndog, Ben found that he was much more amenable to the crowds of Fantasyland.

He was glad that he felt better, because nothing compared to Rey’s face as she stepped into Fantasyland for the first time. She lit up. She glowed. She sparkled. And he got to witness it all.

That brought a true smile to his face for the first time that day.

She bounced as they rode the old, opening day dark rides—Pinocchio and Peter Pan and Mr. Toad. And when they climbed into a teacup, Ben began to think that maybe _this_ time, he’d enjoy Disneyland for the first time.

Rey’s love of life had always been contagious. Knowing what he knew now about her childhood, it all made sense. The way she made friends with everyone she met—the way she expressed joy at even the smallest of pleasures—it was something Ben hadn’t quite understood before. But seeing her here, living a dream she’d had since childhood, he appreciated that contagiousness for the first time.

By the time they made it back to Toontown, he found that he couldn’t wipe the grin off his face.

Before she took a picture with Mickey, Ben insisted on buying Rey a pair of ears.

Rey insisted that Ben get one, too.

When they got to the front of the line to meet Mickey, Rey was bouncing again. Even as a kid, Ben had never wanted to meet characters. It seemed weird. Talking to someone in a costume felt unnatural. And he was already bad enough at talking to begin with.

But not Rey.

The moment it was their turn, Mickey took one look at her and threw his arms wide open. Ben watched with wide eyes as Rey walked straight into the mouse’s arms and hugged him for five, ten, twenty seconds.

“Is that okay?” Ben asked the balding photographer in a hushed tone as Rey continued to cling to Mickey.

He expected the man to look annoyed as he clicked away on his camera, but instead, he smiled warmly.

“Mickey always knows when someone needs a hug,” the man reassured him as he took another picture. “And he never lets go until you’re ready.”

As if on cue, Rey pulled away and began to chat to Mickey. She was speaking quietly enough that Ben couldn’t really hear what she was saying, but whatever it was, there were tears in her eyes. When Rey wiped her tears away, the photographer had them pose.

“You wanna get in there?” the man asked, his eyebrows raised in expectation.

“Oh, I don’t—”

“Come on, Ben. _Please._ ”

Even Mickey beckoned him over.

He might have groaned, but he couldn’t help the half smile that grew on his face as he stepped up to greet the mouse. Ben expected Mickey to offer a hand to shake or high-five, and it came as a surprise when he opened his arms for a hug again.

Ben had to stoop a bit, but he had to admit, it was less weird than he’d always pictured.

In fact, it was kind of nice.

The photographer snapped a couple more pictures, and Ben picked up the scanned card as Rey gave Mickey one last hug.

By the time they made it out of Mickey’s house, Ben had already decided to buy and download that photo, no matter what the inflated cost was.

~*~*~*~

They watched the parade after that. Rey waved to every character with the same enthusiasm as the four year-old across the way while he ate a churro. When it passed, they rode Roger Rabbit’s Cartoon Spin. Then the Matterhorn. Rey wanted to try Autopia, so Ben agreed and let her drive like a maniac on the predetermined track. He kicked her ass at Buzz Lightyear’s Astro Blasters, which was much more fun than he had remembered. They even managed to ride Space Mountain twice before lights started settling and the time to find a place for fireworks approached.

Rey found a perfect spot in front of the castle and parked it while Ben fetched slides of pizza. When they finished the last bites, she insisted on treating them to ice cream. He managed to swallow his pride and accept a Mickey ice cream sandwich.

“Who’s eating Mickey-shaped foods now?” she teased as she took a bite of her own ice cream bar.

He stuck his tongue out at her—the most childish thing he’d done in a while.

She did the same back to him.

Maybe it was okay to be like a kid sometimes. Around her.

When the fireworks started, Ben was torn between watching the spectacle and watching Rey’s face. Like he had all day, he chose the latter.

Seeing the fireworks through Rey’s eyes was like seeing fireworks for the very first time again. She gasped and laughed in all the right places. The smile on her face was wider than he’d ever seen it before.

And her eyes… this was how they were always meant to be. Sparkling and joyous.

Toward the end of the show, he focused on the castle for a while, caught up in the swell of the music and flash of the fireworks. But when the finale burst, illuminating them in a wave of color and sound, he looked back at Rey to find her crying.

They weren’t tears of sadness. Ben knew that right away. They were happy tears. Streaks from her eyes fell across the apples of her cheeks and down to the dimples from her smile. Even so, she hastily wiped them away when the music faded.

“You okay?” he asked once the crowd began to disperse a little. “I saw you crying.”

“During the fireworks, I just kept thinking about how lucky I am. How the little girl who stared at that tv would have given anything to be standing here.” Rey reached down and took his hand, lacing their fingers together with a squeeze. “I know Disneyland has never been your favorite, but you took me anyway. So thank you, Ben. I loved every minute of today. It’s a memory I’m going to carry around forever.”

Ben’s heart was going to burst. He was sure of it. He was going to become a pile of goo right here in front of the castle.

“Let’s go upgrade our tickets,” he blurted. “To annual passes.”

Rey drew back. “What? Annual— _Ben?_ ”

“I have plenty in my savings account. Let’s do it. We can come again next weekend.”

Ben watched as Rey processed his words. She blinked, stared at him with furrowed brows, and blinked some more.

“Are you sure?” she whispered after a minute. “That’s… that’s so much, Ben. And I know you don’t like it here. Just today was enough.”

He shook his head. “But it’s not, Rey. Believe it or not, I had a lot of fun. I love the places that give you joy, and this is one of those places. You deserve so much joy, Rey.”

The next thing he knew, he had an armful of Rey. Her face was buried in his chest. It was like holding his whole world.

“Thank you.” He barely heard her murmur over the background noise, but it was there.

“Besides.” He grinned into her hair. “I hear they’re opening a huge Star Wars land soon. And we haven’t even been to California Adventure. They have _booze_ over there.”

The two of them headed to the front of the park hand in hand and Ben took care of their tickets as promised. When they left City Hall, they were carrying two brand new Disneyland annual passes.

Rey was bouncing again.

With thirty minutes until the park closed, Rey asked Ben what he wanted to do, insisting it was his turn to choose something. Part of him wanted to just go home at this point. His feet ached and the idea of crashing into bed was beyond appealing.

But then again, there was something...

“You know,” he said, considering all the spokes around the castle. “I just remembered what my favorite ride was as a kid.”

“And what’s that?”

He grinned.

Taking Rey’s hand, Ben led her back down into Tomorrowland. There, on the right hand side, was their destination.

“Star Tours?”

“The one and only.”

“Is that like… a Star Wars thing?”

“Well, yeah.”

“God, Ben. You’re such a nerd.” She stood on her tiptoes and kissed his cheek. Ben felt the tips of his ears heat up. “But you’re my nerd.”

_Star Tours_ was even more fun than he remembered—had they changed the ride? He didn’t remember going on a pod race last time. He cheered through the whole thing, putting his hands in the air when they went into hyperspace. He was even picked to be the Rebel Spy. When they got off the ride, it was him who couldn't stop grinning. Rey just beamed up at him.

They exited through the gift shop and Ben let his gaze linger a while at the build-your-own-lightsaber station. But they could do that another day. They would definitely be back.

The park officially closed as they made their way back to the front. Cast Members lined the path, waving and telling them to have a good night. Beside him, Rey was leaning on his shoulder, her eyes drooping. He already knew that she would fall asleep on the car ride home.

“Happy birthday, Rey,” he whispered as they passed the Emporium.

“Thanks for the best birthday ever.” Her speech was a little slurred from sleepiness. “I’m really glad you had fun, too.”

Ben smiled to himself. Today _had_ been fun. It had been full of more joy than he’d felt in a long time. Nothing could have made it better.

Almost nothing.

Just before they exited, right on the edge of Main Street, Ben stopped to buy a balloon. A blue one.

He held on tight this time.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I nearly cried writing this, not gonna lie. 
> 
> "I will live in Disneyland  
> Make my home in Disneyland  
> Maybe it's all fake, that's a chance I'll take  
> It's perfectly okay.  
> Someone give me Disneyland  
> Take me there to Disneyland  
> And when I get to Disneyland  
> I'll stay."
> 
> Thanks for taking time to read this little story. Love to you all!


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